Aggie Jokes

Discussion in 'Esther's Follies' started by Chop, Dec 16, 2020.

  1. Chop

    Chop 10,000+ Posts

    I know you've got 'em. Post 'em here.
  2. horninchicago

    horninchicago 10,000+ Posts

    Why do Aggies write "TGIF" on their shoes?

    Toes Go In First
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  3. horninchicago

    horninchicago 10,000+ Posts

    A real life Aggie joke.

    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Like Like x 1
  4. horninchicago

    horninchicago 10,000+ Posts

    • Funny Funny x 1
  5. Vol Horn 4 Life

    Vol Horn 4 Life 5,000+ Posts

    Its sad to think that due to technology kids of today won't have jokes like these to tell when they are my age.
    • Like Like x 2
  6. Chop

    Chop 10,000+ Posts

    A couple of ags went deer hunting, but weren't having any luck sitting in the blind. They called up the landowner of their deer lease, explained their predicament, and asked: "So how do we find the deer around here?" The landowner said: "I dunno. Why don't you follow the tracks." Two aggies were found dead later that day--run over by a train.
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    Last edited: Dec 31, 2020
  7. HornHuskerDad

    HornHuskerDad 5,000+ Posts

    Then there's the aggie who moved to Oklahoma and raised the IQ of both states.
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  8. Chop

    Chop 10,000+ Posts

    Sad story:

    An aggie froze to death outside a movie theatre in Alaska the other night. He was waiting in line to see "Closed for the Winter."
    Last edited: Jan 23, 2021
  9. HornHuskerDad

    HornHuskerDad 5,000+ Posts

    Telephone conversation between and Aggie farmer and the advisors at A & M:

    Aggie - "I'm trying to raise chickens. I bought some chicks and planted them feet first. They all died. So I bought some more and planted them all head first. They all died. What am I doing wrong?"
    A &M expert - "I can't know for sure until you send us a soil sample for testing."
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  10. Gladius&Pilum

    Gladius&Pilum 100+ Posts

    My favorite:

    A Texas A&M graduate who had been living in Austin for several years decided he wanted to see what this UT place was all about, so he signed up to audit a course on Deductive Reasoning. At the end of the first class he was so impressed with the concept he went down to the prof to get more info.

    The Aggie said "Man, this is the best course I've ever taken. Can you use that Reductive Rationing on me?"

    The prof smiled patiently and said, "Let me ask you a few questions and by your answers, I'll deduce something about you". The Aggie was delighted and said okay.

    Professor: Do you have a lawn mower?
    Aggie: Yeah!
    Professor: Then you probably have a yard to mow.
    Aggie: Wow! Yeah I do!
    Professor: Then you probably have a house with that yard.
    Aggie: Yeah! (Aggie is getting more and more excited with every question)
    Professor: Then you're probably married and may even have a kid or two by now.
    Aggie: Yeah, that's right!
    Professor: Then I deduce that you are a heterosexual male.
    Aggie: Oh my gosh, that's like witchcraft! That's AMAZING!

    The Aggie was so impressed by this he called his dad as soon as he got outside the classroom.

    Aggie: Hey Dad, I just finished my first day at the t.u. Deductive Reasoning class. It was the most amazing thing I've ever learned in my life!
    Dad: Deductive Reasoning? I don't understand.
    Aggie: Let me ask you a question or two and by your answers, I'll deduct something about you.
    Dad: Okay!
    Aggie: Do you own a lawn mower?
    Dad: No.
    Aggie: ***!
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