Basic Things That You Don't Know ...

I am a disgrace to manhood when it comes to prowess on a grill. I'm totally intimidated by those ******* things. I can break down anything at all with electrical wires in it and master the most arcane PC issue, but I'll burn a ******* steak quicker than you can catch AIDS in a Haitian whorehouse...

I also suck at installing doorknobs...

 

i dont know how to can goods, i have failed multiple times at attempts to grow my own vegetables, i would like to be able to take some wheat, turn it into flower and make some baked goods but i have no concept how that is done.

 

I don't know which is flotsam, and which is jetsam. There, I said it, and I'm a better man for admitting the truth.

 

I never know when to use "effect" and "affect." Drives me crazy.

 

WorsterMan
- How to figure out women...
The OP is basic things, not impossible things!

 

I don't know how to juggle...

 

Which boards I should post certain Threads on. What goes "In the Stands" v"On the Fields" is beyond my knowledge level.

 

Jessica Simpson thought that Chicken of the Sea tuna was chicken.

And the longer I live, I understand that I really don't know a lot and I've quit worrying about it. You can't know it all, despite what some of the other posters on here think.

 

I have more trouble with the "par" and "per" in separate.

 

Central Daylight Time vs. Central Savings Time.... I just say Central time to cover it.

when a FG is blocked and the ball goes forward, who can touch it? I still don't understand the Leon Lett play vs. Miami about 12 years++ ago.

why are there so many damn fees at closing for a house?
why can't the selling fee be about 1% instead of the 6% murder?

 

affect = a stands for action. when you affect the outcome.

effect = end result. when the final effect is known.

not sure if capital/ol is on this thread...
capital - final a stands for austin, the city
capitol - 'o' is like hte rotunda<?> on the building.

 

I can't shuffle cards.

 

1. how to tie a tie
2. shuffle cards
3. how to say "rural" w/out soundling like I have a mouth full of marbles.
4. What the f**k a frush is

 

its vs. it's... Which is possessive and which is a contraction.

Lay down, lie down... I don't even worry about that one anymore.

How can anyone eat black licorice?

Why does "will not" = won't.

How can anyone smoke in a car with the windows up?

 

I wish I knew more about electronics. I am not very handy at all. I can barely change the batteries in a flashlight.

 

That Danke Schoen wasn't sung by a woman, just a very young Wayne Newton

 

I don't know how pawn shops stay in business.

I never see anybody buying anything there.

 

Why I can write tons and tons of stuff to someone online or in an email, but can't carry a conversation one on one.

 

I don't understand how aggie/aggie marriage whether hetero or gay survive. It seems that the amounts of frustration embarrassment and dissapointment with which they have to deal with,(being fans of the cult) on a daily basis would have a profound effect on their relationship.

 

I don't know why our kidneys and lungs are the only internal organs we have two of.

Why no love for the backup liver?

 

we have multiple parathyroid glands, multiple lymph nodes, 2 arms, 2 legs, 2 butt cheeks, 2 breasts (essential for the survival of the species).

some stuff in 1's, some stuff in 2's.

the stuff in multiples we usually can survive on with only 1, (i.e. lung/kidney/boobs for the kids) but its less than ideal.

 

I'm 39 and have never been able to figure out 2 things:

Is 12 noon am or pm. Same for midnight. I have absolutely no idea.

Labor day and Memorial day - which one is at the start of summer and which one is at the end? All I know is I get a 3 day weekend.

The only thing I can guess is that I was absent from school the day they covered these things in class and my brain is now too old to absorb this info. I've been told the answers to these 2 things a million times and I still don't have a clue.

 

Anything electrical is a mystery to me. I do not understand amp, watts, etc. I even have my ham radio license and I still do not understand it. I have bought and studied books on it and it will not stick with me. I do not know why.

When I was young I could sing pretty well. Well enough to be in a choir and sing duets in front of church. But something has happened and I can not carry a tune at all now. I do not know why.

 

What "quarter of" means.

When someone says to arrive at a quarter of six, do they mean 5:45 or 6:15.

 

Can't keep track of which direction I'm headed North, South, East, West. Its easy for me to lose track.

 

how to do a cartwheel.