Friends, OrangeBloods, Texas folk, raise up and cheer; I come to bury sooner, not to praise him. The evil that sooner does lives after them; The good is oft interred with their bones; So let it be with OU.The haughty Okies Hath told you OU is greatness: This is not so, it is a grievous sham, And this Saturday, OU will be laid to rest, Here, under shadows of Dallas and the rest-- For Okies are not honourable men; But the Longhorns, the noblest of men-- Come I to speak at OU's funeral. Sooner is not a friend, not to me: But Sooner sayeth he is ambitious; And that Sooner is an honourable team. He hath brought many losees home from Dallas Whose losses did the fans of OU despise: Did this in OU seem ambitious? When that the drunk hath cried, OU hath wept: Ambition should be made of Texas Pride: Yet Sooner says he is ambitious; But Okies are not honourable men. You all have seen that at the Cotton Bowl We presented them with many a beating, Which OU does venhemently deny: is this honour? Yet OU says to be ambitious; And, again, they are not honourable men. I speak not to disprove what Sooner claims, But here I am to speak what I do know: 57-40-5. You all do love our Great State, with plenty cause: What cause withholds you then, to smite the crimson and cream Okies? O judgment! thou art fled to homerism, And men have lost their reason.Bear with me; OU will lay in the coffin with their 3.2 beer, And I must pause till rational thoughts come back to me. But yesterday the word of Mack Brown might Have stood against the world; now he prepares to smite the Sooners. And none so deserving more of this fate than Sooner. O Texans, if I were disposed to stir Your hearts and minds to mutiny and rage, We would do Texas justice, as we chant "OU SUCKS", Who, you all know, are not honorable men: I will do them wrong; I rather choose To wrong the Okies, to wrong that wasteland called Oklahoma and Stoops, One should receive the blessing of all that is good. But here's a parchment with the seal of the ancient greats; I found it in their closet, 'tis their will: Let but the Texans hear this testament-- Which, pardon me, I do not mean to read-- And they would go and cause Okies wounds And dip their ladels in their tainted crimson, Yea, snatch a chinstrap of Sooner for memory, And, dying, mention it within their wills, Bequeathing it as a rich legacy Unto their issue.<span> </span>Friends, OrangeBloods, Texas folk, raise up and cheer; I come to bury sooner, not to praise him.The evil that sooner does lives after them; The good is oft interred with their bones; So let it be with OU.The haughty Okies Hath told you OU is greatness: This is not so, it is a grievous sham, And next Saturday, OU will be laid to rest, Here, under shadows of Dallas and the rest-- For Okies are not honourable men; But the Longhorns, the noblest of men-- Come I to speak at OU's funeral.Sooner is not a friend, not to me: But Sooner sayeth he is ambitious; And that Sooner is an honourable team.He hath brought many losees home from Dallas Whose losses did the fans of OU despise: Did this in OU seem ambitious? When that the drunk hath cried, OU hath wept: Ambition should be made of Texas Pride: Yet Sooner says he is ambitious; But Okies are not honourable men.You all have seen that at the Cotton Bowl We presented them with many a beating, Which OU does venhemently deny: is this honour? Yet OU says to be ambitious; And, again, they are not honourable men.I speak not to disprove what Sooner claims, But here I am to speak what I do know: 57-40-5.You all do love our Great State, with plenty cause: What cause withholds you then, to smite the crimson and cream Okies? O judgment! thou art fled to homerism, And men have lost their reason.Bear with me; OU will lay in the coffin with their 3.2 beer, And I must pause till rational thoughts come back to me.But yesterday the word of Mack Brown might Have stood against the world; now he prepares to smite the Sooners.And none so deserving more of this fate than Sooner.O Texans, if I were disposed to stir Your hearts and minds to mutiny and rage, We would do Texas justice, as we chant "OU SUCKS", Who, you all know, are not honorable men: I will do them wrong; I rather choose To wrong the Okies, to wrong that wasteland called Oklahoma and Stoops, One should receive the blessing of all that is good.But here's a parchment with the seal of the ancient greats; I found it in their closet, 'tis their will: Let but the Texans hear this testament-- Which, pardon me, I do not mean to read-- And they would go and cause Okies wounds And dip their ladels in their tainted crimson, Yea, snatch a chinstrap of Sooner for memory, And, dying, mention it within their wills, Bequeathing it as a rich legacy Unto their issue.
It was actually scribbled out in a bar some 9 years ago, and updated here n there. Maybe I missed a revise....
