My Final Adios

Discussion in 'Locker Room' started by kingdez, Dec 25, 2003.

  1. nycLonghorn

    nycLonghorn Guest

    My sincere condolences.
  2. shorty

    shorty 250+ Posts

    May God Bless you, Shane.

    PhxHorn inspired most posters to achieve better wordsmithing abilities. It was the exchange of thoughtful, well worded posts that lured and addicted me to the old 360 board.

    I never met him but felt I knew him as a dear friend. He will be missed.
  3. DAMCM

    DAMCM < 25 Posts

    Neil, wherever you are,

    I can't help but think you're laughing your *** off about all this.


    All I can say is I know how you must miss him, my friend.

  4. Touchdown

    Touchdown 100+ Posts


    I use to post in the original GoBig12 days as Judge, the Baylor fan. I just recently came back to the boards and had to sign up again since I couldn't post any longer as Judge.

    Your dad was my favorite Horn poster. Never met the man but felt like I had through his posts. It was fun with steve jones, reesetex, oneriver, eyes, etc etc.

    PhxHorn will go down in the Hall of Horn Fame as a great one. Didn't you attend Auburn? I thought I recalled some old posts that indicated you had some connection with the War Eagles.

    Our best regards from our family to yours. It was really sad to open this thread and read of the passing of your dad.


    SRHORN < 25 Posts

    My sincere sympathy to you and your family. I met your father and you at Hobby airport before the Iowa State game a few years ago. I think it was in 2000. We sat together and discussed football at the gate and continued the conversation on the plane. Your dad invited me to join the pregame festivities at Scholtz where he introduced me to Beowold, Java, Pagan Boy and a couple more people I can'[t recall. We talked about many things, all related to UT football. He had vast knowledge of all aspects of the program as well as remarkable insight. Evidence of his devotion to the football program was expressed in a statement he made when I mentioned another UT sport. His response was something like "there is no other sport". I have missed the frequent posts from him and others on the old Go Big 12 site. My he rest in peace in the ultimate skybox!
  6. hotair

    hotair First Time Poster

    Where to begin…what to say?? First, it’s a testament to the man, Neil Kidwell, to read all the replies in this post. It tells a wonderful story of the man who had a way of saying you’re wrong without making you feel bad. Any post he replied to was a better thread.

    I was fortunate to have spent time with Neil in person. I know my wife enjoyed his company since he had a “way” with women…and not just those with “low moral fiber”.

    We spent many pre and post game sessions discussing the trials and tribulations of Longhorn Football and every one of those sessions was worth the time. We had the pleasure of having seats nearby those of Phx and SLX and remember often, during a bad first half, looking up at Neil, watching him make his notes, knowing that I could get a good read on WTF was going on in the game. Many times we’d share a table in the Club and talk…almost always about the game.

    Shane we share your loss.
  7. TexasFan

    TexasFan < 25 Posts

    SL, I don't frequent this BB as much in the past due to being on Orangbloods so much, but when I saw PhxHorn topic on "Adios", I freaked, thinking how could this great poster be leaving...(the site, being banned by Hornfans, or what???) This is of course worse, but at least not unjust as him being banned for something like stating Coaching problems honestly. I remember many posts by your father. He analyzed UT's opponents and the UT's results like no other. If anyone has similiarities to me, then they respected him for his brilliant mind, writing ability, as well as the analytics. WOW, is all I can say, about the man's ability and finding out about his departure.

    I had no idea you guys were related and respect you very much as well as an intelligent, broad thinking human being who happens to be a Longhorn, too.

    You don't want this, but I am too polite as my father has taught me, so my condolences to you and your family. Thinking about your relationship with your father tears me up as my own father is dying. Our father's legacies live through us. Hook 'em
  8. Texagator

    Texagator First Time Poster

    Neil you are already missed. When I had questions you had answers and were gracious enough to share your vast knowledge with others. It is always hard to see someone younger than me pass on. When we win another MNC and we will I know that somehow you will be a part of it.
  9. uthornfan

    uthornfan < 25 Posts

    PhxHorn, my favorite longhorn poster.
  10. Starter

    Starter 25+ Posts

    You and your father's passion for all things UT and the bond it created is eerily similar to that between my father and me. I consistently shared the analysis and wisdom contained in your father's posts with the many UT freaks in my family. Thanks to Phx and the many educated posters on this board I am now regarded as the biggest freak...for that I am eternally grateful!
  11. bevo101

    bevo101 < 25 Posts

    All of us share in your loss.Neil was the best BBS poster ever.I will always treasure the 3 in person conversations I had with him, he was a class act,true gentleman & great Longhorn,& he always wanted to know "Your Thoughts?".
    God Bless![​IMG]
  12. decleater

    decleater < 25 Posts

    Condolences and may god bless Phx's family.

    I don't post very much any more - I guess I've said just about all I've had to say...... Your dad brought that out of me a couple of years ago.
    I came on board about a week before Hornfans opened and followed everybody over here from 360. I had a name like phxhorn or something close to your dads and he politely asked me to change.

    I did.

    As months changed to years your dad and I got into it big time - on more than one occasion - and not allways politely...

    You may remember me as HomerSimmson.

    In fact your pop's first "Adios" post is because of me - at least in part.

    I'm going to tell you something that I never told him. Although I truly felt that he offended some players and also I felt he was too confident in statistical analysis, I allways wanted to fuel his fire. I'm not talking about playing with his head - I'm saying that while everyone else's nose was buried in his ***, he needed someone to call BS..... Absolutely needed it. I have no regrets for our arguments or for anything either one of us said to the other in public... or in private. I think I helped him in some small way, I know he helped me and I think we both helped the program and this board in some small way.

    I was more than willing to play the antagonist to his brilliance.

    I'm really not an ******* - I've coached and impacted football players for 14 years, have a son playing college ball, adopted a 12 year old, yada yada yada...... and all that came to an illumination a few weeks ago when I was futily performing CPR on our Head Coach's father during the National Anthem of a playoff game.

    I saw my dad.... even though this was a guy who I argued offense and defense with, and pushed his son to better our kids.... I saw my dad when cleaning out his mouth and carrying him for the paramedics.

    We all want the same thing...... a good life, love, respect and burnt-orange sunsets.....

    God bless and congratulations for having an awesome dad.
  13. Behold Shiva

    Behold Shiva First Time Poster

    phxhorn was a great number cruncher. A great analyst. A great cyber-presence. He will be genuinely missed in cyber-space and even more by his loved ones. [​IMG]
  14. Vasherized

    Vasherized 25+ Posts

    One thing I'm sure of is that all those sinners that made it to heaven are enjoying his company right now. Mucking through the luddite navigation on the 360 site often made us wonder if this Internet thing was such a great idea, but a PhxHorn post made our monitors shine with wit, reason, and originality. His words made us all feel better about something we loved so much but couldn't always express, at least as well as him. You too SL.

    Thanks for the post and the memories.
  15. longhorn1022

    longhorn1022 < 25 Posts

  16. BigWill

    BigWill 2,500+ Posts

    Man, reading this thread is tough.

    Phx was full of ****, and I mean this in the best way, with full respect.

    I hope that this thread brought some comfort to the family.
  17. Real_Texas

    Real_Texas 25+ Posts

  18. PhxHorn

    PhxHorn 25+ Posts

    For those of you clicking on this post expecting another magnificent PhxHorn opus, I'm sorry to disappoint. My name is Shane Kidwell, and I post as SL Xpress. PhxHorn is my father.

    As most of you know by now, my father passed away --- on Tuesday morning specifically.

    The title of my post is a play on one of my favorite posts of my father's, his "Adios" post. Dad said he was leaving the bulletin boards for reasons I found a bit melodramatic. It was my favorite, because I constantly made fun of him for it. Of course, the outcry persuaded him that maybe he wouldn't leave after all. Unfortunately, no such outcry will bring him back this time.

    It seems appropriate to put this post up on Christmas Day, since he absolutely hated the holiday season, and I’ve always looked for ways to tweak him a bit.

    I should throw in a sprinkling of references to women with low moral fiber, data points, and an excruciatingly detailed statistical analysis, but those aren’t my usual style, and frankly I feel even less creative at this moment than is my usual. However, I encourage some of the better writers on the board to throw out their best satirical attempts if they so desire.

    Just to give everyone a little history, while always a follower of college football, Dad was never really a Longhorn fan until he entered undergraduate school at Austin in the early 60s. After a stint in the Air Force, he returned to earn his MBA.

    He loved UT, and felt grateful for all the opportunities his education provided him. He gave generously to the business school, but it was UT football that earned his greatest passion.

    He brainwashed me when I was a wee helpless child, so unlike him I really had no choice in terms of affiliation.

    As I grew we engaged in interminable conversations regarding the Longhorns chances in the upcoming season, quantifying how difficult each opponent might be, dissecting strengths and weaknesses of the team, and speculating as to exactly when Barry Switzer would reveal himself to be the Anti Christ and lead his hordes in the Apocalypse. All before I reached the age of 10.

    As in all such relationships, we had our share of ups and downs as Father-Son, but we always had the bond of Longhorn football to draw upon even during the worst of times.

    I remember in 1996 telling him about the GoBig12 site, also known as, or Austin360. Affiliated with the Austin American Statesman, it was the first widely used bulletin board for Big 12 college football fans. I remember the Nebraska and Texas A&M boards being particularly active, but it was the Longhorn part of the site that generally drew the most traffic.

    One of the things Dad and I remarked to each other often in those early years was how the conversations on the bulletin board echoed our lifelong exchanges. To paraphrase Dad, “I didn’t know there were any other sick fucks like us out there. Some of these guys may actually be worse. I love it!”

    After a few months of lurking, Dad made his first post. I wish I had saved it, but I didn’t foresee the type of icon he would quickly become. To me, he simply posted the same kinds of thoughts, analyses, idioms, and expressions he had shared with me throughout my life. But to the folks on the bulletin board, he was a refreshing contrast to anything else they had ever read, in any format.

    In Dad’s rise to the pinnacle of his profession, there simply wasn’t the opportunity to attend many games, but with the advent of his retirement, his newly available leisure time was significantly dedicated to UT football. He attended spring and fall practices, as well as all the home games. He developed contacts through the Internet, turned his keen analytical eye towards the program, and fortunately for us, shared his thoughts in his unique, inimical way.

    In all honesty, Dad found traveling to the games a big hassle. As anyone who knew him can tell you, Dad’s personality wasn’t suited for tolerating inconvenience. However, by that time we had formed such powerful relationships with the people with whom we had interacted online, that Dad relished the opportunity to renew those acquaintances with his regular visits to the Austin area --- even while continually grumbling to me regarding the hassles of the travel industry, and Austin’s apparent personal grievance against him as demonstrated by the lack of synched traffic lights downtown and the continuous closing down of the street in front of his hotel for a myriad of obscure fundraising events involving weirdo fitness freaks.

    As any of us know, trying to describe the power of the relationships we’ve formed through this medium is impossible for anyone who is not a part of it. Even now, I’m having difficulty communicating to my family how powerful Dad’s presence was on Internet, or the kind of impact he had on the people who participated therein. I think they’re going to be a tad shocked with the representation of Longhorn fans at the funeral.

    I treasure the last 7 years with my father. Our relationship bloomed with the opportunity to attend the games together, as well as our shared love for our friends we discovered through this forum. As anyone who saw us together can attest, I recently lost not only my father, but truly my very best friend, and I’m not sure how in the hell I’m supposed to fill the void that I now carry with me.

    Since neither my father nor I were ones for maudlin posts or sentimental expressions, I request you keep any condolences on this thread to a minimum. I’m fortunate enough to be surrounded by many supportive people, including a significant representation from among the most active participants on this board. Their phone calls and words of love and friendship mean a great deal to me. This thread though, is not in my opinion an appropriate place for it. There appear to be other threads that can fill that function adequately.

    However, I do enjoy reading about any kind of impact, big or small, positive or negative, that my Dad’s posts --- or his presence if you happened to have had an opportunity to meet him --- might have had on you.

    He was the most fascinating person I’ve ever known, or will likely ever know in the future. I say that not only because he was my Dad, because I would have thought that if our familial relationship had never existed, and there are plenty of others without such that agree with me.

    For all of us who were touched by him in some way, we consider ourselves fortunate having had him in our lives. For those of you who were never able to know him on any level, you missed out on a great great great man.

    Your thoughts?
  19. MinnesotaHorn

    MinnesotaHorn 25+ Posts

    I was thinking of PhxHorn today so I sought this post out. The thread kicks me in the balls and tickles my funny bone at the same time. The genuineness of the replies serves as something of a time capsule. PhxHorn probably mocks this eloquently with a peppering of 'fucks'.

    Over the past few years it's been my pleasure to get to know SLX. It's been said that eventually we all become our fathers which is a glib and simplistic adage but it endures due to a small measure of truth: something of our Dad exists in all of us and manifests itself more as we progress through life. SLX is witty, frank, wry and unswervingly himself in all situations. Despite his very accepting nature I always feel like I had better bring my A game and hope for the best. Sound like anyone else we've known?

    I said above (six years ago) that I regret greatly never havng the opportunity to meet Neil in person. But in a way I have now. I'm a richer man for that.

    Oh and PhxHorn, those are my thoughts.

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