I thought that we could kind of make a repository of things that you should never do, a collection of hard-won knowledge that future generations could use. The only rule is that you have to have learned your lesson from personal experience. So here's mine: Never go camping, reach into your shaving kit in the darkness, dig around in it for your toothpaste, put the toothpaste on your toothbrush, and discover after-the-fact that your toothpaste was, in fact, actually hydrocortisone cream. The result is not pretty.
You don't tug on Superman's cape You don't spit into the wind You don't pull the mask off the ol' Lone Ranger And you don't mess around with Jim
Never play cards with a man named Doc. Never eat at a place called Mom's. Never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own.
never ever try to have a calm, coheret, logical, and unbiased conversation with an aggy about their university. do i win?
There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese.
Never date someone who says all their ex's are crazy. Cause it's not the ex's who are crazy... Never trust a calico cat.
Cleaning a clogged lawnmower or snow blower should only be done when the engine is stopped. Wish me luck - going out to throw snow right now with this:
Never get on a train to a Red Sox game with a friend named Smurf whose wearing a Yankee jersey and hat.
Never sleep with your best friend's sister...unless you plan to marry her or are already married to her.
Never bet a Gooner that all Texans are smarter than all Okies. They'll pull an aggy out of their *** every time. DU-OOH!
