So, at what point do you know that you either are one or close to being one? Ever feel like you have had enough nights that you either do really dumb things or cant remember that next time you do it, you could end up in trouble?
There is a million different ways to answer your question. The reality is if you feel out of control in your drinking, then you probably could stand to stop for awhile. If you are blacking out (not remembering your actions) with any degree of frequency then you should consider cutting back a bit if not stopping drinking all together. Blackouts are a ticking time bomb. If you put yourself in that position enough times, something is eventually going to happen to you or someone around you that you won't be able to apologize for. That said, if you have been a daily binge drinker for an extended period (marked by years) then you should probably go get a check up from your GP and let him know your plan. Alcohol detox can literally kill you, if you having been drinking sufficient quantities for long enough. Doing it on your own, is usually not a very good idea.
One of the screening tools that is commonly used is known as CAGE: - Have you ever felt you should cut down on your drinking? - Have people annoyed you by criticizing your drinking? - Have you ever felt bad or guilty about your drinking? - Have you ever had a drink first thing in the morning (as an “eye opener”) to steady your nerves or get rid of a hangover? 2 or more positive answers indicate a possible problem, and indicate the need for a more thorough evaluation. I am not telling what my score is.
Alcoholics Anonymous gives you a very quick test to give yourself to determine if you are indeed alcoholic. 1. Are you able to quit entirely? 2. When you drink do you have little control over the amount you take (once you start)? Here is the actual verbiage:
According to Anastasis, I might have a problem. According to notreally, I do not. And Sat night, I was drinking shine at a party, along with tequila and beer and I smoked a brisket and made beanless chili which offended some Tennesseans and not the 2 New Yorkers....(lack of beans offended them)
Alcoholics are alcoholics before they take their first drink, you don't get turned into one at some magical point. Regardless of the diagnostic criteria, nothing changes for anyone until they make the change happen They usually can't do that with alcohol and drugs until they've faced the fact that they have lost control... which brings me back to one central point, if your drinking, or things that happen when you are drinking, scares you then you need to address it. If your first black out didn't scare you enough to change your habits... then yeah, you probably have a problem. If you've had multiple blackouts, and you are just now asking the question... then yeah, you probably have a problem. In any event, you are a lot less likely to hurt yourself or others if you slow it down.
If you have to ask then yes might be the answer. However one can just be a heavy drinker and not the alcoholic type. It is not so much the amount that you drink, but what happens when you put the first one in. So people are alergic to shellfish and some people are alergic to alcohol. If you really want some answers, go to an AA meeting. Find out your truth.
going to an AA meeting isn't going to help you too much. i grew up in AA surroundings, and i have a special kind of loathing for al-anon specifically. anyone who drinks probably thinks they should drink at least a little less. drinking ain't good for ya. this is obvious. kind of like smoking. but, i would say that if you do more "dumb" things - ie, your decision making is so ****** that you do something terribly embarrassing or mean or whatever, more than 1 or 2 times a year, seek help. if you miss work more than a couple of times a year (super bowl "monday" doesn't count) because of hangovers or late nights, seek help. if you have three or four pops a night, with no major problems, sleep tight. no worries. it all comes down to personal choice and handling your ****. if you're the type that likes to drink and can keep your **** under control, i say knock yourself out. i know a few folks who knock out a sixer a day and operate like a normal person. i know a few folks who drink too much three nights a week, and it fucks their **** up a lot worse because they can't handle it. i got a friend who can't handle his ****. once he starts drinking its like an ugly spiral. it all comes down to handling your ****. i think that, for as much as america drinks, we worry about it A LOT. i think that there is a pretty big underground temperance movement in the country that is gaining ground.
I think most of these tests are overly sensitive. What I see as a problem is feeling a compulsion to drink, or to drink continually day after day.. or to drink excessive amounts (user defined), or start drinking from plastic bottles because it is more affordable, or to drink in conjunction with depression (Note: depression is not sad).
Not meaning to hijack.... One of my close, close friends and roommate drinks a lot. I mean, a lot. He pretty much gets plastered every night. It's just his thing. He's been doing this as long as I've known him (almost 4 years). He's not a mean drunk or anything like that, and it isn't like there are multiple episodes...only a few, which I managed to keep under control. Anyway, how do you confront people about their drinking? I know he would be very defensive about it. I don't want to ruffle feathers, but I feel so irresponsible not saying anything. I love the guy and would hate for any health problems to occur, or for him to hurt himself. I would never forgive myself if something happened to him and I never got the balls to say anything.
Alcoholics are alcoholics before they take their first drink, you don't get turned into one at some magical point. I also agree that this is, to put it mildly, not true. While this may describe some alcoholics, probably those with some kind of genetic predisposition toward alcoholism, there are undoubtedly some who drink, and for whatever reason, start to drink way too much, thus becoming an alcoholic. And who says that there is a "magical point" involved, as if there is one concrete moment where one becomes an alcoholic? It could be a gradual, or not so gradual, process. The reality is that most alcoholics are that way probably long before they realize, or admit to themselves, that they are.
SubliminalHorn, what you need to be asking yourself right now is why do you want to involve yourself in this? Is he family, is he a close personal friend or is he just some guy you live with? Involving yourself directly into an addict's recovery is a messy business, if you aren't prepared to stick it out, then you have no business doing it. If he is just some guy that you think has a problem, then your personal responsibility stops at providing him alcohol, encouraging his drinking (drinking with him), and enabling his binges (cleaning up after him, covering rent when he can't, covering up for him with work/family, etc). If he asks you if you think he has a problem, you can say "yes, I think you need to see a GP about what you are doing to yourself". If you can't live with that, its time to either move out or kick him out. There is no casual way to drop a bomb like "I think you are killing yourself". If you are looking for one, you aren't going to find it.
Here's the thing. He's an extremely close, personal friend. His drinking doesn't directly affect me. He's never late on rent and is by all accounts, very functioning. He doesn't have one enemy in this world. Not one. He would give you the shirt off his back if you needed one. He's literally, a one of a kind friend. That's why it's so hard for me. I don;t like people interjecting their opinions into my life, so I never do it to anyone else. But, I still hate seeing him get so drunk and know he's probably causing a lot of damage to his body. Yes, I'm willing to stick it out. It's what close friends do.
SubliminalHorn, so your problem is with the quantity and frequency he drinks, but everything seems ok? He doesn't break stuff, he doesn't miss payments, he doesn't miss work, he doesn't lose friends for his behavior?
Well, he has broken stuff....his toilet, which would have flooded the apartment below had I not checked on him. No, he doesn't miss payments or work. In fact, he dazzles at work. Yes, my problem is with amounts and frequency. I don't know if you intended this tone, so forgive me if I am wrong. It almost sounds like you are hinting that my concern is unfounded because he is functioning, is this right?
Not at all, I apologize if I gave that tone. What I'm getting at is that I'm not sure what terms you can put your concerns to him that isn't going to sound like you are minding his business. If he is your close personal friend, then you have the right to be concerned about him in any situation. That said, if he doesn't think he has problem, then you've got to consider what you are going to sound like to him. If your worry is about his health, well, you really aren't in a place to assess that. He needs to get in front of an MD and have a physical. If an MD gives him a thumbs up, then that alleviates your concerns right? Maybe you need to go get one yourself, and then recount the experience to him and tell him he needs to as well.
True. and that's exactly why I haven't said much about his drinking. I understand that this could be one of the hardest things about which to confront a friend. Thanks for the replies, mia.
