Hornfans mentioned here at end:
The year was 2001 and the location was Jones Stadium. The incident is called “GoalpostGate II” by some because of the controversy that surrounds the events of that day. The Texas Tech Red Raiders beat the Texas A&M Aggies and, although we were favored, some idiots in the student section decide to bring down the goalposts.
We (I say “we” because I made it onto the field but was not part of the contigent bringing down the goalposts) decided to march the goalposts out of the stadium, with an intention to lay them at the feet of Will Rogers and Soapsuds. However, members of Lubbock’s finest decide to blockade the easiest route out of the stadium, the player tunnels. As if by some sort of telepathy, the entire mob decides that the next easiest route out of the stadium will be to the Northeast, over the fence.
Keep in mind that that 5 minutes have already passed.
Well, one problem. The Agroids were glued to thier seats, stunned as they watched the mob make their way towards them at a rate slower than molasses. Apparently, Aggy wants to practice their Yells because they hadn’t done well enough in the game, as evidenced by their loss. Either that, or they ran out of time. The final score had been 12 – 0, so at the rate they were scoring, maybe with another 6 or 8 quarters they could’ve overtaken the mighty Red Raiders.
Another 3 or 4 minutes passed as the mob marches the goalposts 120 yards to the north. Some of the nastier Agroids decide that they’ve seen enough of the celebrating and start flipping the mob off and chant “You Suck, You Suck.” This only enraged the mob who had endured the Agroids “practicing” a Yell during the playing of the Texas Tech School Song after the game and before the goalposts came tumbling down.
In response, the mob starts chanting “Aggies Suck, Aggies Suck!” A few guys from within the mob decide to climb up into the stands to guide the goalposts over the Aggs since they won’t move. One guy, who was leading the right post, walked up 4 rows past Ags without saying a word to instigate what came next.
Apparently, Colonel William McKinney, Governor Rick Perry’s Chief of Staff, decided he’d had enough and decided to take action to defend the Aggy turf. It must’ve looked like the Mexicans climbing over the outer walls of the Alamo Mission because of the way he described the scene afterwards: “It was like I was defending the Alamo.”
Well, Kernal McKinney tries to push some hapless chap over the wall back into the crowd of Mexicans, and others in the area viewed this as a provocation and a riot broke out.
The fisticuffs lasted approximately 3 or 4 minutes as two different areas broke into fights.
Afterwards, news media gathered around McKinney as he recounted his tales of heroism in defending the Alamo. McKinney proudly proclaimed that he decided to swing his binoculars in the air, much like an olympian does in the hammer throw, to hurt the “next one that came over that wall.” McKinney was bleeding profusely from his right eyebrow; McKinney said he was blind-sided by a Techie and had “the fool knocked out of him.” (What I have in quotes are actual things he said.) Tech Athletic Trainers attempted to dress the wound, but he refused attention from them, demanding that A&M Trainers bandage him.
Well, McKinney promises to hurt Tech in Austin where in the next budget meeting; after all, he was Rick Perry’s right hand man. The next day, Perry comes out and publicly blasts Texas Tech fans everywhere and is harshest on the school administration.
You know, if you hear Aggies describe the story, it sounds as if everything happened the instant the final gun sounded. Hearing it from them, it sounded as if they were being accosted by 400 college aged guys that had come straight from working out at Gold’s Gym.
Well, 2 or 3 days go by and people everywhere are examining the videos from the melee to determine who exactly was at fault. Tech President Schmidley (a former A&M faculty member) promises to be harsh on anyone involved. 6 students are identified and 2 are kicked out of the University.
Another day goes by and a young Black man approaches the media regarding the incidents. He’s an Aggie and he was there. He admits to the media that he was the one that “knocked the fool” out of McKinney. When asked why he did it, he said “I did it because the guy was spinning his binoculars around looking for someone to hurt. I did it to keep him from hurting anyone.”
Agroids everywhere are appalled by the man’s admission. Why in the world would an Aggy punch another Aggy? Well, Ags decide to ostracize him for his admission instead of McKinney, because this obviously makes Aggy look bad. Red Raiders everywhere are left waiting for McKinney to apologize… and we’re still waiting on his or Governor Goodhair’s apologies for blasting Tech before all the facts were known.
Well, another day goes by and pictures begin to circulate. Amongst them are pictures of the crowd that accosted the Aggies.
Well, guess what? 90% of the crowd happens to be Junior High Kids!!! As I mentioned before, hearing the Ag version makes it sound as if there were hundreds of College guys, but here was proof otherwise! This only added to the comedy that was “GoalpostGate II.” One boy in particular, a boy by the name of Vincent Valdez, aged 13, helped lead the charge against the Agroids. His image was plastered everywhere. Here is a picture of a boy leading the charge to pounce on the Ags, wounded by the loss!
He was wearing a “GAP” shirt and was surrounded by other characters, such as “The Pirate,” “Tank Top Girl,” and “Harry Potter Kid.” Hardly a group that appears mean enough to take down the Aggy empire. Anyways, enough talking… It will become quickly evident to you why the Gap Kid has served to ridicule Aggies everywhere and why he has grown to become an internet legend amongst RaiderPower and Hornfans posters.
This is the real t-shirt that I was wearing in the pictures I have kept it ever since then. It will be signed “In Memory of Jud Thorne” “Vince Valdez, The Gap Kid 2005”
You can pick up the shirt from me on campus or I will ship it anywhere.
Bid generously,
Vince Valdez
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