Using a Bidet

Discussion in 'Esther's Follies' started by Dude, Jan 23, 2008.

  1. Not that Bob

    Not that Bob 500+ Posts

    "A woman demonstrates how to properly use a bidet." [​IMG]

    That just can't be where the handle goes, can it?
     
  2. Meursault

    Meursault 250+ Posts

    Bob, you don't **** in the bidet.

    It's more like a sink... for your undercarriage.
     
  3. Not that Bob

    Not that Bob 500+ Posts

    Yes, I get that, but still..if I washed my butt in the sink, the sink would stink. Unless you clean the bidet following every use, it's going to stink. Running some extra water isn't going to cut it. It would have to be washed following every use. Maybe I just have a sensitive nose.
     
  4. Mr.Wizard

    Mr.Wizard 1,000+ Posts

    no skid marks is a positive.
     
  5. William Cannon

    William Cannon 250+ Posts

    The toilets at work have a built in bidet, but I think it's more of an *** washing flaw, than a designed in feature since it uses the same water. Needless to say courtesy flushes are rare.
     
  6. Hornin Hong Kong

    Hornin Hong Kong 1,000+ Posts

    good japanese toilets are the greatest thigns ever once youget the alignment right

    take a dump no matter how nasty it sprays you clean then drys you with hot air.

    no need to wipe - i always do but never need to.

    i just bought a house and will def buy one and install it
     
  7. kujotx

    kujotx 500+ Posts

    No way. I don't trust anything that requires you to maintain proper balance to prevent you from impaling yourself in the anus. That's just one of my rules.

    On the flip-side, I visited my cousin's island house in Sweden and they had a self-composting toilet.

    Let that ferment for a second: self-composting.... toilet...

    I apologize for spoiling your lunch. It was probably no good anyway.
     
  8. Benson32

    Benson32 1,000+ Posts

    [​IMG]

    i wouldnt mind using a japanese toilet. are there any buttons here for sexual pleasure?
     
  9. Lat22

    Lat22 1,000+ Posts

    I'm sure the ones we had in Cabo had some type of laser aiming device because they were, let's say, dead on.
     
  10. Mrmyke709

    Mrmyke709 1,000+ Posts


     
  11. TrashMaster G

    TrashMaster G 250+ Posts


     
  12. LongIslandIceSIP

    LongIslandIceSIP 500+ Posts

    I used them when growing up over-seas. Also, when in Korea for work trips, the toilets have an integrated "water-spray-system". Like HorninHK, I always used paper just to be sure, but my *** was always clean and dry by the time the machine was done.
     
  13. Idahorn2

    Idahorn2 250+ Posts

    I wonder if the lady pictured above is not approaching the device the wrong way. I have this vague feeling the bidet is more for washing frontal things; could be wrong, of course.

    The French are funny about these things. My Dad told me more than once that all I needed to know about the French Army is that the Officers washed their hands prior to using the latrine.

    Ever used their toilet paper? It most resembles wax paper.
     
  14. Waller Creek

    Waller Creek 100+ Posts


     
  15. HornsOverIthaca

    HornsOverIthaca 250+ Posts

    Oh gross. I wasn't sure what a bidet was so I looked it up on Wikipedia...

     
  16. HORN_FAN_86

    HORN_FAN_86 100+ Posts


     
  17. Austintxusa

    Austintxusa 2,500+ Posts

    Love the bidet.

    But for the high pressure ones, positioning is critical.

    [​IMG]
     
  18. MAROON

    MAROON 250+ Posts

    The Japanese have perfected the bidet and they have also perfected the air hand dryer. These things work great, are quick - no more drying hands then wipe hands on pants to get really dry.
    www.mitsubishijettowel.com/
     
  19. TNLonghorn

    TNLonghorn 500+ Posts

  20. bevo_daddy

    bevo_daddy 500+ Posts

    We had a toilet in our suite in Vegas that cleaned with water and also air dryed your ***. It was pretty cool no wiping needed.

    It also closed the lid automatically when you sat up
     
  21. GuadaHorn

    GuadaHorn 100+ Posts

    haha, check out the "related videos"
     
  22. Roger

    Roger 1,000+ Posts

    I was just in Brazil and they have what amounts to hose with a spray nozzle in the stalls. I was a little worried about using it at work and getting all my clothes wet, but in the hotel it was nice. Still use just a little tp to dry yourself
     
  23. l00p

    l00p 10,000+ Posts

    You can easily make your own at home using a spray bottle. You can change the effects to spray or stream or any combination in between. So I hear.
     
  24. Meursault

    Meursault 250+ Posts

    I use the presumably unapproved wipe then wash technique. Not really brave enough to leave my *** cleanliness to a weak stream of water alone. Very refreshing however.

    Since this thread is still going, here she is:

    [​IMG]
     
  25. kujotx

    kujotx 500+ Posts

    OK... This confirms my earlier fear of high-potential of anal impalement. Check out the amount of "square-inchage" you're dealing with here, people. That's perilously small.

    Unless you have the inner-ear of a fifth degree black belt in Cha Yon Ryu, I would not suggest teetering butt-first over this porcelain contraption.

    Your bathrooms are way too small over there! You're not taking full advantage of "happy-time" in such a small WC.
     
  26. ctrl+alt+del

    ctrl+alt+del 500+ Posts

    I'm afraid I would enjoy it too much.
    [​IMG]
     
  27. mdmost

    mdmost 100+ Posts

    How is that water clean? Separate hose from the regular toilet water line?
     

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